April 25, 1992
How did we get so lucky? I don't know why we're still ok. It's really all a shocking mystery to me, but all the love and congrats that have poured in this week have caused me to reflect. We are far from perfect, of course, but 25 is no guarantee and worth celebrating. If this comes across as self-congratulatory, I apologize profusely. Because who knows what allows a marriage to succeed, really. But here are 25 theories on why Doug and I have been lucky enough to stay mostly happy in this marriage gig.
2. Dumb luck.
3. Blind luck.
4. Great examples. Our parents were both married in 1959. My parents celebrated 51 years before my dad's sudden death. Doug's parents just hit 58. Both are fantastic examples of partnership, loyalty, commitment.
5. Realistic expectations. Neither of us relies on our marriage to answer all of our hopes and dreams. It answers some. Others it doesn't.
6. Humor. He still makes me laugh. Doug busts out with horrible 1970's songs, with some regularity, at the most bizarre times. Think "muskrat love" while rushing to make the train.
7. Adventure. We take risks together. Starting with moving to Mexico for six months before our first anniversary and right up to starting a band last year - we both like to scare ourselves a little bit.
8. Music. shared love, shared hobby.
9. In the inimitable words of Rocky Balboa: gaps....we fill gaps. He can't find anything. I can find everything. He's patient. I'm impatient.
10. We have our own friends, in addition to shared friends.
11. Faith. It's not what brought us together, far from it, but it's been a mutual move toward it, and it's been a challenging, interesting, satisfying journey to share.
12. We're good at different things, parent-wise. I'm better in the day to day. He's better in the big-picture/pulling-back-the-lens decisions and discussions.
13. I cook. He stays out of my way. He cleans. I stay out of his way.
14. His family is fun. We like to spend time with them.
15. My family is fun. We like to spend time with them.
16. I love that shorthand every couple and family develop over time. Catchphrases, quoting things your kids said when they were 2, movie lines that have kept you laughing for 25 years....
17. A similarly high need for exercise. We're both a touch insane that way.
18. We're both news junkies.
19. Date night. Even when we were broke, babysitter money was an essential budget item, not an optional one.
20. The same general attitude about money: no debt except the mortgage, live within our means, save, but splurge sometimes. Splurging is important.
21. He adheres to the "n-1" principal of number-of-bikes-I-must-own, "n" being the number of bikes that would precipitate a divorce. (See number 20. And number 17.)
22. We both love to eat. And drink. And travel brings out the best in us.
23. We both think our kids are, by far, the best thing our marriage has produced.
24. Did I mention we're lucky?
25. We're holding out for all the gold we'll get in 2042.
And speaking of movie lines that keep you laughing, 25 years later, I leave you with this.....
Mawwiage. Mawwiage is what bwings us togethew today. Mawwiage, that bwessed awwangement, that dweam within a dweam. And wove, twue wove, wiww fowwow you fowevah and evah… So tweasuwe youw wove
tweasuwe youw wove indeed. Thanks for indulging me. Onward, to FOOD!
On the actual anniversary last week, I made a ton of chicken piccata. We ate with the boys, then they drifted off and Doug and I sat at the table for hours, drinking wine, eating, drinking, then, of course, watching The Americans. ( OBSESSED -we just started season three.)
The above is Melissa D'Arabian's version, and it's killer, but I've never met a chicken piccata I didn't love. All are variations on the following theme:
chicken cutlets or pounded breasts, rinse and dry.
dredge in flour, add salt & pepper.
cook in hot olive oil, about 6 minutes per side. Remove chicken to tray.
To pan add a package of sliced mushrooms and cook until soft, 5 min?
Add some white wine and lemon juice (1/4 cup each), stir up the yummy bits,
Add 2 tbsp capers and a couple tbsp butter, simmer a bit, pour over the chicken on a platter. Voila.
Breakfast Mini Quiche Muffins
I am also trying to get my son Noah to eat something before he leaves the house. Noah is that rare and alien life form that forgets to eat. I don't understand it at all, but it happens all the time. So I decided to up my breakfast game and made some incredibly tasty heat-and-go-mini-breakfast-muffins:
Mix together 8 eggs, 1/4 cup cream and 1/4 cup milk (or 1/2 cup milk)
add some chopped up veggies (I shredded about a cup of spinach and chopped up 1/2 onion and 1/2 a red bell pepper.) Add to the eggs with salt & pepper. Mix in about 1/2 cup of shredded cheddar.
Cook up some bacon or sausage. I had some spicy jimmy deans and cooked it up and drained it. Then added to the egg mixture.
Grease up a muffin tin. Add 1/4 cup of the mixture to each.
Top with a little more cheddar.
Cook at 350 for about 25 minutes, till eggs are set and cheese is melted.
Let cool. Store in an airtight container in fridge, then grab, heat and go!
To the next 25.....